Menchie’s: the Zooey Deschanel of frozen yogurt

By Chason Gordon
- The Capitol Hill Times -

Chason Gordon / The Capitol Hill Times

Behavioral psychologists suggest that too many choices can lead to anxiety, but the customers at the new Menchie’s on Broadway don’t seem to have this problem. They revel in the 16 flavors of frozen yogurt and over 40 toppings to accompany them. I’ve always been hostile towards foods that pretend to be other foods, so there is no one better to guide your Menchie’s experience.

Like all Menchie’s, the new location on Broadway (right next to Blue Moon), looks like a new age daycare. The walls are awash in pastel colors and one gets the sense that behind all the cuteness and friendliness is a horrible evil (see title). When approaching the great wall of frozen yogurt, you have the option of sampling the flavors with a small cup, or going in blind like Skywalker when he destroyed the Death Star.

It took me about ten minutes to figure out how to use the machines, and at one point I completely panicked: “It won’t stop coming! Somebody get me another cup! I need another cup!” The flavors being offered were chocolate, vanilla, pistachio (eww), peanut butter cup, red velvet, tara (what?), cherry tart, original tart, cake batter, orchard cherry (as opposed to cherries found on the road), kiwi raspberry, fruit punch, mint chocolate, dole mango pineapple, and two called “this flavor will be back soon,” which I am not familiar with. There is also a liquid tungsten flavor, but since the price is based on weight, you should probably avoid it.

The toppings section is a cavalcade of crumpled candy bars, mini chocolates, cereal, soft candy, sweet sauces, and fruit (fruit is great for pretending Menchie’s is a healthy experience). Their standout is clearly the popping boba, a small jelly ball filled with fruit juice that pops when you bite it. It’s like eating delicious bubble wrap, and I had to resist the temptation to press my fist into the serving tray and pop them all.

When you’ve loaded up your cup to Mount Rainier proportions, you bring it over to the scale. First they weigh you holding the cup and then they weigh you without the cup, which is a great system as far as I’m concerned. After I paid, a guy slammed a big mackerel on the scale and said, “What’s she weigh? I lost three men for this fish.”

The new Menchie’s is one of those experiences that is hard to shit on (see title). Their staff is friendly (I got a sticker!), the process is fun, and the frozen yogurt is generally good quality, though I find the sorbets to be a little better than the confectionery flavors.

Every few years Seattle gets itself into a food faze. We went through pies, bubble tea, teriyaki, and now find ourselves enrapt with frozen yogurt. It will certainly do until the next one arrives.

507 Broadway East
Sun through Thurs: 11 a.m . to 11 p.m.
Fri through Sat: 11 a.m. to Midnight